Weird, Apparently There's No Epstein List

According to Trump's FBI and DOJ, not only did Jeffrey Epstein take his own life, but his infamous ‘client list’ does not exist. Wow. LOCAL BEAR INVESTIGATES MISSING BEEHIVES, FINDS NO EVIDENCE OF FOUL PLAY.

The list, which has been the subject of speculation since the disgraced pedophile died in 2019, was said to include detailed records of his activities with high-profile individuals including flight logs to his private island, on hi plane nicknamed THE LOLITA EXPRESS.

The new information, released in a measly, two-page memo, directly contradicts theories floating in right-wing circles surrounding the nature of Epstein’s death and an apparent government “deep state” plot behind it; prominent conservative figures have repeatedly called for the Trump administration to release the files in full.

Trump’s Attorney General Pam Bondi revealed in February she had been given Epstein’s client list from the FBI, which she was preparing to investigate and release on grounds of “transparency”, noting “Americans have a right to know.”

However now, ALL OF A SUDDEN, investigators found “no incriminating ‘client list’”, along with “no credible evidence... that Epstein blackmailed prominent individuals.” It adds there is no “evidence that could predicate an investigation against uncharged third parties.”

It says investigators have viewed a video from the Manhattan prison that supports a medical examiner’s finding the 66-year-old took his own life.

The memo also adds there will be no charges for anyone else involved in the Epstein case; his associate Ghislaine Maxwell is currently serving a 20-year sentence on child sex trafficking and related charges. Apparently she was trafficking these kids to no one.

The DOJ memo states that one of the government's highest priorities is “combatting child exploitation and bringing justice to victims.” It then adds: “Perpetuating unfounded theories about Epstein serves neither of those ends.”

Bondi was asked in February when the DOJ would release the list of Epstein’s clients. She told Fox News, “It’s sitting on my desk right now to review, that’s been a directive by President Trump.”

The next month, Bondi clarified the FBI initially had only handed over “a couple of hundred pages of documents.”

She added, “You’re looking at these documents going, ‘these aren’t all the Epstein files, there were flight logs, there were names, victims’ names, where’s the rest of the stuff? And that’s what the FBI had turned over to us.’”

After receiving “thousands” of pages, Bondi said in March, “We’re going to go through it as fast as we can but go through it cautiously to protect all the victims of Epstein because there were a lot of victims.”

Bondi added, “We believe in transparency, America has the right to know. The Biden administration sat on these documents, and no one did anything with them. It’s a new day, it’s a new administration everything’s going to come put to the public, the public have a right to know, Americans have a right to know.”

Trump said, about being on Epstein’s list, “That’s called ‘old news.’ That has been talked about for years. Even Epstein’s lawyer said I had nothing to do with it–it’s old news. This has been talked about for years and years. And as you know, I was not friendly with Epstein for probably 18 years before he died. I was not at all friendly with him.”

The news of the latest memo shocked many MAGA influencers. Savanah Hernandez posted on Twitter, “Why did Pam Bondi get in front of the entire nation and say she had the Epstein client list on her desk? She should step down as Attorney General for lying to the American public.”

Alexander Sheppard, who was jailed for his role in the January 6 riots, said on Twitter, “Dan Bongino either lied to us on his podcast for several years or he is lying to us now…" Deputy FBI Director Bongino, along with FBI Director Kash Patel, have been among the most vocal of the Epstein files.

MAGA influencer Chad Prather, who was among right-wing figures given access to the batch of released Epstein documents at the White House, also lashed out at the update on the so-called Epstein list.

“Where is the Epstein info the American people were promised? You handed us a notebook and promised more was on the way,” Prather posted. “You told us it existed and now you say it doesn’t? America deserves answers.”

Conservative activist Robby Starbuck added: “Pam Bondi said the Epstein client list was on her desk to review for release to the public just a few months ago. Now the DOJ she leads claims that there’s no Epstein client list. Sorry, but this is unacceptable. Was she lying then or is she lying now? We deserve answers.”

Far-right activist Laura Loomer also accused Bondi of “lying” about releasing materials related to the late pedophile. “Who releases a statement about the Epstein files on the Sunday night of 4th of July weekend? Someone who doesn’t want you paying attention,” Loomer added.

I can't believe things have gotten so bad that Laura Loomer sounds like a rational voice of reason - broken clocks, as they say.